Monday, June 20, 2005

Hit Me Baby (No, Seriously)
Well, it happened.
I promised myself I wouldn't watch Hit Me Baby One More Time. The concept seemed so sleazy: get washed-up musicians that I loved from the 80s , make them perform covers of current pop crap, and have the audience vote for their favorite. Basically, turn them into American Idol contestants, albeit ones who have already sold millions of records of material they actually wrote back in the day. How demeaning.
But then I heard rumblings that the show was actually entertaining. So on Thursday night as I'm heading out of my apartment, I decide on a whim to DVR that night's episode.
Then I watched it over the weekend.
And, lo and behold, I'm now obsessed with it.
This is train-wreck television like you've never seen. The episode I saw featured the awe-inspiring line-up of Wang Chung, Sophie B. Hawkins, Cameo, Howard Jones, and Irene Cara. They look ridiculous. They're only allowed to sing 90-seconds versions of their biggest hit. They have to record Where Are They Now? packages, where I learned that most of them have their own studios, the lead singer of Cameo is really really really into astronomy, and Sophie B. Hawkins apparently hasn't bought a new bicycle since 1964. They choose wildly inappropriate cover songs (Wang Chung doing Nelly's "Hot in Herre" must be seen to be believed). The host, imported from the UK, is brilliantly inept, adding such thought-provoking color commentary as "wow, Bowling for Soup!" (He also looks and acts alarming like Alan Partridge, the hilarious Steve Coogan character who had a string of British sitcoms that are now being shown on BBC America). Oh, and Howard Jones got ROBBED! He blew the other performers out of the water, but I think was penalized for performing a slow song. Irene Cara inexplicably won, even though she couldn't hit the high notes during "Flashdance (What a Feeling)" and has the audacity to name her backing band Hot Caramel ("like my last name," she excitedly explained).
There is nothing redeeming about the show at all.
And yet I just know I'll DVR it again on Thursday.

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