Amazing that it's taken me so long to share this bit of good news (I've been pulling 15-hour days at work lately), but... I'm officially a Daytime Emmy winner!
Yup, Cash Cab pulled a major upset over Jeopardy (and, to a lesser extent, the Drew Carey-hosted Price Is Right) to win Outstanding Game/Audience Participation Show at the Creative Awards given out on Friday night. As I was stuck at work that night, I had to watch the show on an online stream. Here's the moment of glory:



Whoever wrote Oscar's copy deserves and Emmy of his/her own.
It's a great feeling, and an unexpected one. Maybe I should have been more confident that we would prevail. After all, my mom kept telling me she had "a funny feeling it would win." And if you can't trust your own mother's funny feelings, who can you trust?

Let Me Explain...
For those of you who read The Borough Standings in the printed issue of this week's Time Out New York, yes, that was me (and the other Fuse writer, Jon Murray, one of the creators of The Fuxedo) who wrote them. But in trying to shorten the first joke (Brooklyn), they basically took out the punchline. I e-mailed the editor to ask them to revise it to the online version, which they did... it can be found here. This version is better, but still not quite right. So since I have this forum at my disposal, here's the joke as we originally submitted it:
A 34-year-old woman who attempted suicide by jumping off the Brooklyn Bridge survived without a scratch on her body. But she did contract syphilis, scabies, and gonorrhea from swimming in the East River.

One last keepsake brought from home... my very own baseball card!
Sort of.
When I was 7 years old, an amusement park named Boardwalk & Baseball opened a few hours from my house. I never went, but according to reports, it was a crummy park and a spectacular financial failure.
In 1987, my sister went to the park on a school field trip, and she had a personalized baseball card made up for me. Here it is (front and back):

(click to enlarge)

When she gave it to me, she expected it to be a huge hit. And it probably would have been, had she not fucked it up in the following ways:
- My birthday is 8/17/79, not 6/17/79
- My favorite team was (and still is) the New York Yankees, not the New York Mets
- The photo should've featured me in a baseball uniform (or at least doing something even vaguely athletic), not a geeky polo shirt.
She has tried to argue that most people got their photo taken at the park, where they could physically put on baseball uniforms for the camera, and since I wasn't there in person, she had to bring a photo with her. I argue back that I had definitely played Little League baseball by that point, and I'm sure there had been photographic evidence of it, so she should've brought one of those photos with her.
Regardless, this should go down as the lamest baseball card ever produced.
Although the stats are pretty impressive.

Big Empty
If you know me at all, you know that I was thrilled to hear Stone Temple Pilots had reunited for a summer tour. I'm planning on catching their show at the Borgata on August 9 (as an early birthday celebration), but after news of Saturday's Return of the Rock trickles out, I wonder if they'll make it that far.
Earlier today some co-workers were discussing the weekend's concert, at which STP apparently started the show an hour and a half late... and when they did finally play, Weiland was so wasted that he kept screwing up the words. I thought they had to be exaggerating, so I did some research.
This NY Times article backs up the claim of Weiland's sub-par performance.
This Opie & Anthony sound clip describes the wild backstage antics leading up to the performance.
Come on Scott, keep it together...