Tuesday, November 02, 2010

Chronology of Celebrity Crushes

1998: Natalie Imbruglia

In the history of mankind, has there ever been a more adorable girl than Natalie Imbruglia in the "Torn" video? Of course not, what a silly question. With her adorable doe eyes and her adorable haircut and her adorable Australian accent that pops up when she sings "floor" and her adorable dance moves at the end of the video. So adorable!

Post-Torn thumbs-up: With long hair, she went from adorable to just plan gorgeous. Kind of like a thinner, less lippy Angelina Jolie.

And she landed at #6 on a BBC poll of the Most Naturally Beautiful Women of All Time. Not a bad showing.

Post-Torn thumbs-down: Her acting career never really took off. And now she judges The X Factor in Australia rather than focusing on her own music. Which is kind of like a failed athlete becoming a gym teacher.

Monday, November 01, 2010

Chronology of Celebrity Crushes

1997: Serena Altschul (MTV News)

Watching MTV for its news coverage is a bit like reading Playboy for its articles: somewhat entertaining, but almost entirely unnecessary. That all changed with the arrival of Serena Altschul in the mid-90s. She injected beauty into a group of otherwise unattractive correspondents (Tabitha Soren, John Norris, Kurt Loder). And she was actually a good newscaster! Looks and talent... what a rare combo on MTV.

Post-MTV News thumbs-up: She helped create True Life, which is still going strong. Then she managed to get jobs with CNN and CBS News. Respectability!

Post-MTV News thumbs-down: She just turned 40 last month. 40! How is that possible?!?