2 Gross
Thanks to Gawker for pointing out this website, where a mere $33 can get you a shit (er, "fecal matter") sample from David Lee Roth. The only thing stranger than the concept is the roster. Never before have Norman Mailer, Gary Busey, and Def Leppard's one-armed drummer been in the same place at the same time. And props to them for at one point having DNA from the least-famous Goonie.

And thanks to co-worker J__ for sending me this link, with before and after photos of a face-transplant patient. He has an odd resemblance to the acid-attack victim who wanders the NYC subway system.